If there's one city that can make a first date go all the way, it's Paris. Better still, a hip host of new hotels is now welcoming dirty weekenders to the City of Light. Rooms vary from the slutty to the sassy, and all are bound to please. In all cases, hotels in Paris are cheapest in January and August.
Best for under $65
With wooden floors and fluffy pillows, St Christopher's wins the award for Paris's sexiest hostel. Built in 2008, it's a visual spectacular: glass elevator, rainforest atrium and cool canal-side location. Romantic movie buffs can grab a bike from the cycle stand outside and cruise into central Paris a la Amelie (this cult French flick was filmed nearby). Romantic tightwads can indulge in $8 dinners and the all-inclusive buffet brekkie.
Sexy extras:
A (thankfully soundproofed) basement nightclub for last-chance liaisons.
Downsides? Shared bathrooms down the hall may dampen the post-coital glow.
Best available double rooms from: $63
Best for under $100
A hybrid cross between hostel and hip hotel, Oops! offers stunning rooms wallpapered in far-out colours. All rooms (even the dorms) boast en-suite toilets and showers. The Latin Quarter action is a 15-minute walk away, the ever-romantic Jardin des Plantes even closer.
Sexy extras: Some double rooms have balconies — and you don't see many of those in Paris for under $100.
Downsides? Books up way in advance, so don't leave your sensual surprise too late.
Best available double rooms from: $92
Best for under $150
Sandwiched between sexy St Germain and the studious Sorbonne University, there are few better locations for a Parisian weekend a deux. Rooms are movie star glamorous: each has fine linen, flock wallpaper and a brand new iMac.
Sexy extras: Swing-arm TVs mean you can watch your Dirty Dancing DVD in bed.
Downsides? $131 doubles are available to early bookers only. And breakfast is extra.
Best available double rooms from: $131
Best for under $200
In early 2010, the Notre Dame gave Christian Lacroix carte blanche on their 26 tiny rooms. The fashion designer printed medieval scenes onto special plastic backdrops and installed carpets designed with red brick and chopped log patterns. And miraculously, it all works. Topping the design is the jaw-dropping panorama over Notre Dame Cathedral. The handful of rooms without a view can still see the scene via a webcam piped through to their flatscreen TV.
Sexy extras: Rub up against the calfskin headboards.
Downsides?If you want the view, you'll have to put up with a bit of traffic noise.
Best available double rooms from: $196
Best for under $230
Open since July 2010, it's anyone's guess how many liaisons sexuelles have been played out in the Seven's glamour-shag guestrooms. Even the least expensive Levitation rooms have beds suspended above a hazy blue light, and an infinity mirror wall so you can view 100 tiny versions of yourself. The bedstead is a see-through shower screen. Say no more.
Sexy extras: The 007 suite is an Austin Powers shag-pad, with a cinema screen that slides open at the push of a button.
Downsides? A Metro ride away from Paris's main sights.
Best available double rooms from: $223
Best for under $250
Lie on one of the beds in the Marais' newest, coolest hotel and the walls literally dance before your eyes. These LED-studded glow-walls are covered with cavorting couples, and you can tweak the colours and lighting at will. Bathrooms are like a first-class airline lounge: foldout trays for wine glasses, white sculpted plastic sinks and a freestanding tub lined with Bioo bath products.
Sexy extras: The NightCove sleep-inducing machines, which lull you to never-never land with soft colours and sounds.
Downsides? Not quite as Marais as the name suggests, but a Metro ride away.
Best available double rooms from: $236
Best for under $300
Opened in 2009, the contemporary luxury of the 7Eiffel will appeal to the refined romantic, rather than the tie-me-to-the-bedstead paramour. Sumptuous rooms have graphic prints on the ceiling, Philippe Starck bucket seats, iPod docks and mirrors absolutely everywhere. Upstairs there's a gorgeous roof terrace dressed with hot pink seats.
Sexy extras: Filthy minds can clean up with toiletries by Fragonard, from the world-perfume capital in Grasse.
Downsides? Regular prices are high, but there are bargains for advance bookers.
Best available double rooms from: $200
Best for under $400
The KUBE is so dashingly modern that reception is a man in a glass cube in the hotel courtyard. Aside from the hip restaurant (a celeb hangout), the hotel has an Ice Bar sponsored by French vodka distiller Grey Goose. It's regulated to Arctic conditions, so guests must don slutty puffa jackets and sip cocktails out of specially carved ice glasses. Icy hearts can even snuggle up afterwards in sleeping bags on a slab of ice.
Sexy extras: Rooms are opened by fingerprint scan, so jilted lovers can't follow you up from the bar.
Downsides? Near Gare du Nord it's handy for Eurostar, but not so handy for the shops.
Best available double rooms from: $316
Best for under $500
The Sezz can take a dirty weekend to another level by pre-delivering flowers, rose petals and bottles of Veuve Clicquot to your room. (The hotel has a special relationship with the champagne house, and is literally awash with the stuff.) The seriously brave can also order from an additional Time to Tease menu of nipple adornments, blindfolds, double-ended lollypops, handcuffs and more serious toys. If playtime gets too much, there's a basement hammam and Jacuzzi.
Sexy extras: Rooms are frightfully cosmopolitan: guests should be sophisticated enough not to giggle at the transparent bathroom walls.
Downsides? It's so cool that there's no reception desk. Wow.
Best available double rooms from: $441
Best for under $1100
Le Royal debuted in October 2010. It's not only Paris's most contemporary five-star hotel, but also the least stuffy and most sexy. Even the cheapest 'artists studio' rooms are gigantic, and come complete with TV-mirror and acoustic guitar. Luxury lovers can check in to the Royal Monceau Suites: 190m2 play-spaces lined with mirrors and hand-made Philippe Starck furniture. But at over $6500 a night, your significant other had better be worth it!
Sexy extras: Even (extremely well-dressed) paupers can sup in Le Bar Long. The walls in this Starck-designed cocktail lounge are lined with exotic spirits.
Downsides? Le Royal Monceau is royally expensive.
Best available double rooms from: $1027
See more of these sexy hotels in our gallery!
For more Paris accommodation info, check out our unbiased Insider's Guide to Paris.
Where do you like to stay for a dirty weekend in Paris? Have you stayed at any of these hotels? What's the sexiest hotel you've stayed at? Share your thoughts below!
